Those of us who have been raised with religious backgrounds have often been taught that sexuality and spirituality are opposing forces, that you cannot be virtuous if you have sex because sex is a “sin” or is “unspiritual.”
Prior to dogmatic ideologies, sexuality was respected for thousands of years as a sacred expression of nature’s life force and the mystery of creation.
To lead a spiritual life you need to embrace and respect your sexualityjust as much as any other part of your nature. Although sex has been linked to many dirty and “perverse” ideas, the act of lovemaking can truly be something sacred and profound.
HOW TO DEAL WITH SEXUAL GUILT AND SHAME
Sexuality is a taboo topic in our society because it is one of those primal forces which we consciously or unconsciously feel powerless to control. Deep down, we sense that it is connected to that unknown universal source of energy from which we came from and continue to exist within.
The feeling of shame is one of the biggest obstacles most of us face in learning to embrace our sexuality. In a culture that has infected us with the notions of virtue and shame; where a murder scene on television is more “viewer-friendly” than a lovemaking one; where women were once thought of as incapable of experiencing an orgasm, it becomes apparent how difficult it is to openly accept and acknowledge this life force that exists within us.
Shame is an emotion that we’re taught by our families and communities. Since a very young age we’re taught what we “should and shouldn’t feel bad about,” and as a result of this we develop the capacity to experience guilt. Through guilt we begin rejecting sacred aspects of ourselves and repressing them deep into our Shadow Selves; our sexual desires, quirks, attractions and fantasies.
I’ve even seen some people deny their sexuality, dismissing it as a “lower physical instinct/vibration” or claiming to “rise above it” as if there is a division between “lower” physical cravings and “higher” spiritual functions when we are seekingwholeness. Sex forms the base notes of your Spirit’s musical melody.
Of course, you are more than solely a sexual being: your sexuality doesn’t define you, but it is a part of you. But it’s by denying it as a part of you that you create blockages of energy within your body that perpetuates the fragmentation of your soul, keeping you incomplete and restricted instead of expanded and whole.
Ironically, it is the sexual orgasm that gives us a taste of soulful expansion, of transcending our limited selves, and feeling boundless for the first time in our entire lives (if only a momentary glimpse).
SPIRITUAL SEX: 3 TYPES OF DIVINE UNION
Many of us haven’t been taught that sex is actually a powerful tool of transcendental development. In fact, spiritual sex is the quickest and easiest way to have something resembling amystical experience.
The powerful thing about sexual energy is that it’s one of the few instincts within us that can rarely be completely “civilized.” If you are tired at home from work and a friend offers you to go out to watch a movie you may pass on the offer. But if you were to meet an attractive person instead who was to make him/herself available to you, it would arouse a deep energy within you that you weren’t aware existed.
Any type of ecstatic experience – like sex – is an ideal starting point to begin cultivating spiritual moments of “no-mind” and bringing them naturally into our daily lives. In my experience, there are three main types of sex that you can benefit from:
1. THE ALERT UNION
Most first time sexual experiences with partners fall into this type of union. When we make ourselves vulnerable, intimate, exposed and “work” toward that mutual pleasurable moment of bliss, our conscious awareness becomes heightened by the novelty of exploring the other person’s body.
This union is not so much a mindful awareness but an alert awareness that instinctively takes over. Our feelings of vulnerability and excitement make our natural adrenaline mechanism stimulate alertness making the experience much more primal than spiritual. This type of sex is very addictive as the novelty of pursuing new sexual partners rewards us with that momentary “god-like” state of consciousness.
2. THE CONSCIOUS UNION
It’s typical however that as our sense of vulnerability and stimulation weakens so too does our desire for the first type of love-making (The Alert Union).
In The Conscious Union, we learn how to cultivate a more balanced form of spiritual sex, one that creates harmony between the passionate animal and sensually playful sides of our sexuality. In The Conscious Union we listen to our sexual desires, explore our bodies and those of our lovers, build deeper intimacy through eye-gazing, sensually caress, and follow our deepest forms of sexual expression. These often generate intense feelings of union and love that briefly take us beyond our sense of self.
It is through this practice of conscious union that we can reach the next stage of soulful union.
3. THE SOULFUL UNION
There’s a beautiful term in the Sanskrit Tantric scriptures known as “Maithuna” which literally translates to “sexual union.” Maithuna is one of Tantra’s most important teachings as it makes use of conscious “sexual intensity” as a ladder that ascends to greater heights of intensity, focusing upon the illumination of the soul rather than solely on physical sexual pleasure.
The sexual urge derives its strength from the body and our emotions, and by itself is not powerful enough to lift us to new levels of conscious awareness. It is Tantric sex that helps us to experience a true sexual Soulful Union by helping us to embody our Soul. This type of sex can only be described as a feeling of boundless pure bliss, warmth and identity-merging (or ego loss) especially during orgasm.
If you would like to experience Soulful Union via spiritual sex, here are some recommendations:
- Stay celibate for as long as you can. This will increase your sexual energy so that you can learn to channel it. You may feel a tingling sensation in your lower back, this is your kundalini energy which assists in the experience of Unity.
- Set aside time to dedicate only to your partner. Create a sensual space with candles, soft ethnic music, silken robes, aphrodisiac fragrances, and so forth.
- Sit in front of each other and lightly move your hands over your partner’s body (to awaken their nerves). Allow your soft strokes to tingle through their body, but don’t allow your hands to pass over their erogenous zones (nipples, penis, etc.), only near them. Prolong this state of arousal for as long as desired.
- Sit in each other’s lap (called the “yab-yum” position) and breathe each other’s breath. This allows both of you to consciously harmonize with each other.
- Maintain eye-contact throughout intercourse. Witnessing the act of love-making allows you to stay present and see something of immense beauty.
- THE BATTERY EFFECT:
WHEN TWO PEOPLE HAVE SEX WITHIN ADORATION & LOVE THE HEART OPENS AND THE ENERGY BETWEEN BOTH OF THEM GIVE AND RECEIVE. THIS TRANSFER OF ENERGY CAN TRANSMUTE EMOTIONAL TRAUMA UNLOCK INFORMATION WITHIN YOUR DNA ALIGN YOU WITH YOUR HIGHER SELF AND BRING PLEASURE ALL AT THE SAME TIME. INSTEAD OF FEELING DRAINED AFTERWARDS YOU GLOW FEELING REPLENISHED ON A SPIRITUAL PHYSICAL AND MENTAL LEVEL.PAY ATTENTION TO WHOM YOU SHARE YOUR INTIMATE ENERGY WITH. INTIMACY AT THIS LEVEL INTERTWINES YOUR AURAL ENERGY WITH THE AURAL ENERGY OF THE OTHER PERSON. THESE POWERFUL CONNECTIONS, REGARDLESS OF HOW INSIGNIFICANT YOU THINK THEY ARE, LEAVE SPIRITUAL DEBRIS, PARTICULARLY WITHIN PEOPLE WHO DO NOT PRACTICE ANY TYPE OF CLEANSING, PHYSICAL, EMOTIONAL OR OTHERWISE. THE MORE YOU INTERACT INTIMATELY WITH SOMEONE, THE DEEPER THE CONNECTION AND THE MORE OF THEIR AURA IS INTERTWINED WITH YOURS. IMAGINE THE CONFUSED AURA OF SOMEONE WHO SLEEPS WITH MULTIPLE PEOPLE AND CARRIES AROUND THESE MULTIPLE ENERGIES? WHAT THEY MAY NOT REALIZE IS THAT OTHERS CAN FEEL THAT ENERGY WHICH CAN REPEL POSITIVE ENERGY AND ATTRACT NEGATIVE ENERGY INTO YOUR LIFE.“I ALWAYS SAY, NEVER SLEEP WITH SOMEONE YOU WOULDN’T WANT TO BE” ~
- I did not write this but I hope it help you peace xx